Do The Next Thing

How does one move on after the dust of unexpected, harsh reality begins to settle?  Elisabeth (Elliott) would tell you to simply do the next thing.  She would know.  Those are the words that the Holy Spirit whispered to her as she sat in the jungles of Ecuador hearing  the news that no young wife wants to hear; her husband was dead. Jim Elliot, and four other missionaries had been speared to death by the Auca Indians, an unreached tribe that they were praying would come to know Jesus.   

As Elizabeth sat at the ham radio, stunned by the news, she asked God how she could go on in the jungles without her beloved Jim, and as a single mother with an ten month old baby girl.  The Lord impressed a question upon her heart, “What needs to be done next?”  She looked down at her ten month old and thought, Valerie’s diaper needs to be changed.  Elisabeth changed Valerie's diaper.  And then she did the next thing that needed to be done and then the next thing and then …. Elisabeth’s “do the next thing” mantra got her through many dark days.  It is the way to move on from harsh reality ....

Responding to Evil

How easily we are overcome with evil.  Once overcome, we attempt to respond to evil with more evil which simply leads to even more evil. Evil-thinking.  Evil-speaking.  Evil-doing. It doesn't work.  

Jesus tells us the way to overcome evil is with good.  King David implores us to not spend our time fretting over evil, or evil doers as it only leads to more evil-doing. So, here's to random acts of goodness!

(Psalm 37 Amplified Bible; Romans 12:21)

Steve Jobs, The Man

I wrote this post last week, one day prior to the breaking news of the sexual abuse scandal of retired Penn State Coach Jerry Sandusky.  I find that interesting.  When you read the last line, I think you will too.

I was mildly astounded at the outpouring of accolades for Steve Jobs upon the announcement of his death.  I’m all about respectfully remembering the deceased and the personal and corporate accomplishments of Steve Jobs deserved our attention.  He was after all, the brilliant pioneer of the computer revolution, not to mention the co-founder, chairman, and CEO of Apple Inc. along with a myriad of admirable and respectable accomplishments. I was astounded however, because Steve Jobs was also known for being a highly unlikable and uncaring man.  One of his hallmark habits was parking in the handicapped parking space at Apple.  He was not handicapped nor was he considerate. Clearly.

In reading the website allaboutstevejobs.com I discovered that back in 1981, the Macintosh project founder sent a list of complaints about Steve Jobs to the Apple president, of those complaints were listed:

• Jobs regularly misses appointments.
• He acts without thinking and with bad judgment.
• He does not give credit where due.
• He interrupts and doesn’t listen.
• He does not keep promises or meet commitments.
• Jobs is often irresponsible, and inconsiderate.

Steve Jobs was also known for having a bad temper; getting angry at random employees and firing them on the spot for trivial reasons.

 

I have to wonder if the outpouring of awe toward Steve Jobs reveals that we are still convinced that we what we DO outweighs WHO we are.  We have it backwards and that's tragic.

Forward Motion in Midlife

"We are disappointed because we age. 
We are dissatisfied because our dreams 

slipped out of our hands. 
We are discouraged that in our sin, we failed many, many times. 

We are disappointed that good things come to an end 
and that people move on. 

Midlife exposes how much we struggle with that fact that 
God completes His work of redemption

in us by keeping us in the middle 
of all of the harsh realities of the fall.  

- Paul Trip, Lost in The Middle

The question that begs my answer is how will I move forward, from grace-to-grace, in this transitory season that is shadowed by disappointment and dissatisfaction instead of, or rather than getting stuck in the quicksand of sadness and regret?  The midlife question is about how one moves on with the new normal that often keeps loss and seeming limitations at the forefront. 

God affirms that the one who finds his/her strength in Him, and in whose heart are the highways of heaven will journey through life from strength-to-strength. (Psalm 84:5-7)

The Weight of Wrong-doing

The weight of wrong-doing.  You've felt it. I've felt it. 

The mental and emotional heaviness of heart and conscience ignited by angry words and loaded reactions. The hurtful tone. The lie that kept things in my favor.  The greed or entitlement that grabbed instead of gave.  The reaction that hurt instead of helped, condemned instead of cared.  The selfishness. The loose lips about another.  The retaliation.  The private relief over the failure of one who hurt first. The bitter heart and rude response. The weight of temptation turned into reality. 

The weight.  That heaviness of heart and mind left behind from the aftermath of sin.  Up close and personal sin or up close and someone else's sin.

The weight of another's choices can prove just as burdensome as the weight of mine.  The worry and the wondering of their wrong-doing.  The unwanted ramifications.  The hurt and betrayal.  The shock and disbelief. The loss. The heartache. 

Wrong-doing is heavy. It's weight paralyzes. It's oppressive. It keeps one down for the count.  

Enter the prophet, Isaiah.  Relief for the inner-weight .... an exchange offered by the anointed One  "... a garment of praise for a spirit of heaviness ..."  The only help for the weight of wrong-doing.

Do You Have a Snippet of Time?

We have a Penn State grad student living with us.  A female student named Elyse. Yay! It's amazing, there's actually someone in my home who not only listens to me but hears what I have to say. Smile. In fact, Elyse dialogues with me.  About things I want to talk about.  Don't get me wrong, I love my three guys but I'll let you in on a little secret ... one dad plus two sons plus one mom does not equal deep, meaningful conversation.  Rarely. Even when Ben and Andy lived at home,  time didn't often lend itself to regular, substantial, detailed or emoting kinds of conversation.  It was more on-the-fly, to the point, factual and activated kind of conversation. Meaning, just tell me what I need to DO  and please don't ask me to join you in any kind of mental or emotional calisthenics. (haha)  Most of the time it could barely be labeled "conversation."  Let's just say that's why talking to myself  over the years escalated to a whole new level. Again, don't get me wrong, I have absolutely no doubt that my three guys love me, and the one I sleep with takes really good care of me.  Really good.  None of that is in question but the conversations I have with the Jameson men don't exactly fill me up.  Ok, point made. Hopefully, point well-taken. 

On the other hand, I do love the female chatter that rings in the walls of our home these days.  One of my recent and allusive conversations with Elyse, left me feeling spurred on to offer something a little different for my blog followers ... many who may have moved on to more regular-writing bloggers by now.  Ugh. I discovered something during my late night babble with Elyse that revealed reason behind my not so regular posts. The posts I wrote took big chunks of time. I don't have big chunks of discretionary time in this season of life.  Soon after Elyse and I chatted, she scooted off to bed, always earlier than I scoot and as she did, I had an aha moment. Why not blog with snippets of thought, instead of chunks? Likely my readers can't afford chunks of time to read my posts any more than I can to write them? Yes. That's it. Snippets of thought, wisdom, musings, insight and more.  Snippets it will be.  Final answer. 

So, here's to snippets instead of chunks .... I hope you'll click onto backdrop more regularly again. Let me know how you like it. Or how you don't.

The PLACE Makes All The Difference

In route to the Twin Cities just a matter of days ago, to spend a week with our oldest son, I divided the sixteen hour trek into uneven halves with a one night stay on the other side of Chicago. I'm infatuated with cities; a true city girl through and through!  I actually enjoy the traffic-laden, stop-and-go drive through a downtown metropolis. The buzz of people, the store fronts and billboards, the line of restaurants, the diversity, the hustle and bustle, even the honking gives me a bit of a rush.  However, I was thankful to get through the heart of Chicago that rainy afternoon after ten plus hours confined to my driver's seat. I settled into one of Marriott's temporary bedrooms for a short nightcap fully aware I'd be back on I-90 in just a matter of hours.

I awoke early and was greeted by brilliant sunshine as I dragged the trusty plastic stick to draw back the heavy shade-darkening curtain.  The opening of that hotel curtain collided with the opening of some faded memories from over a decade ago that tumbled into my conscience and caught me unaware.  As I drank in the view of the breath-taking Chicago morning, the skyline sparked memories of being in another city with my late brother, Ron.  Memories matched with a familiar flood of emotions that unwittingly showed up in my hotel room and my heart just after dawn ...

Ron called San Francisco home for well over twenty-five years until the very day he took his last breath on earth.  His third floor apartment, in the Portrero Hill neighborhood, nestled in between what was then called PacBell Stadium and the Bay Bridge. A place that felt like home to me although I've only been back to the city once since Ron's death.  However, on that sunny autumn morning just a week ago, while taking in the Chicago skyline, I had a rather odd but palatable sensation of being back in the PLACE that I grew up simply calling, "the city." As if  San Francisco belonged to my family or something. Smile.


I felt the all too familiar rush of hearing, smelling and feeling city life as if I were actually stepping out onto the sidewalk below Ron's apartment housed on Mariposa Street in the hill-laden streets of  his neighborhood.  As my eyes beheld the windy city's horizon, it was if my nostrils took in a fresh aroma of Folgers Coffee from the plant only blocks from Ron's cozy flat.  I had a strange sense of my leg muscles feeling the stretch while in my mind, Ron and I made the steep trek up to the Daily Grind Coffee Shop for our morning cup.  I was almost convinced that my ears overheard the familiar bell faintly ringing at the local bookstore as my memory opened the door for Ron and me to step inside to peruse a few new titles or pick a needed greeting card. The sensations played out in my memory but the sentiments were so real they felt tangible.

As my minds-eye recaptured moments from life long ago, the Spirit of God made a poignant connection between this odd sensation to something of far greater value.  I could see with the eyes of my heart how much these cherished memories awakened me to the reality that all too often we find ourselves feeling far from our Creator, gently grieving meaningful time lost with God. Time that somehow became a thing of our past; recent or distant.  We despondently wonder if it will ever be "like it was before"  with Him.  As my eyes took in the view from my hotel window, my heart took in a different view and I began to wonder if this all too familiar dilemma has a solution so simple that we somehow miss it?  That breath-taking view of the windy city tossed me back to life as it was in another city ... the city (smile) that my beloved late brother once called home.  I had returned to a PLACE so like San Francisco that it nearly propelled my heart and head to believe I was actually there.


In a similar way, returning to the PLACE you or I used to meet with God is the beginning of recovering the relationship with Him we once enjoyed. It's really that simple.  If we would but hasten back to the PLACE where we used to meet with the Lover of our Soul ... retreat to early mornings or a favored spot in nature, determine to return to church or just to that big comfy chair in the den ... the PLACE where we grew accustomed to listening to the Voice of Truth and pouring out our heart to the God who cares ... that PLACE will accompany us back to time with the Father as we once knew it because somehow, the PLACE really does make all the difference.

This Little Light of Mine

How I remember being a wee little girl in Sunday School at North Highlands Baptist Church some 49 years ago.  Preschool children, who were yet to be labeled such, met in the basement of that vibrant church where my daddy was the Pastor.  We sat in a circle on metal chairs.  No toys. No books.  Often a flannel graph and always an open Bible.  Sunday-upon-faithful-Sunday we learned about the Written and the Living Word of God there in the basement of that Southern Baptist Church in central California.  Every week without fail we sang songs about Jesus, and His love for the little children. All the children of the world.  I remember well one song in particular and singing the old familiar children's melody with heightened glee,

"This little light of mine, I'm gonna' let it shine .. . This little light of mine, I'm gonna' let it shine.  Let it shine.  Let it shine. Let it shine ...."

Maybe you have a similar memory.  Maybe not.  I still have the emphatic sense that I meant what I sang ... as best as a four year old could mean it ... especially the part about hiding it under a bush, and shouting "OH NO! I'm gonna' let it shine ..."  Regardless of my best and most sincere four year old intentions, it seemed that my light would grow dim while my body and my mind grew older and bigger.

How is it that somewhere along this journey called life, the sparkle of  who we were meant to be, the joy of shining with the light we were destined to shine, stops?  How does the little light of mine, or yours, grow so dim or worse yet, get snugged out?

Maybe the unkindness of another puts it out.  Or the harshness of life's circumstances.  Or chronic heartache. Or the cruelty of someone else's words.  Or disappointment.  Or bitterness. Or, God forbid, all of the above.  Maybe those are the things that snuff out the flame the Creator lit within us long before the foundations of the world.  I don't know.  Not for sure anyway.  I do think however, that it breaks God's heart when His light in us dims or worse yet, goes out.  After all, light was God's idea. So was I and so were you.  The very first words of the Bible leave no question,

"In the beginning God created the heavens and the earth. 

The earth was without form, and void; and darkness was on the face of the deep.  

And the Spirit of God was hovering over the face of the waters. 

Then God said, 'Let there be light'; and there was light.  And God saw the light; that it was good; 

and God divided the light from the darkness."

As God hovered, or lingered and contemplated, in the stillness of nothingness the idea came to Him to create light to contrast the darkness.  And His self-judgement declared that it was good.  The light was good.  So much so that He actually divided it from the darkness.  Enter the creation of man, and woman and ultimately, of you and of me.  In each of us, God has put His light.  A piece of Him that we are meant to reflect.  Something of His image that we are destined to display.  A light we were to let shine and not hide under a bush. Oh no. As children we believed that and we sang with gleeful confidence that we would indeed let our little light shine!  And then we grew up.

And somewhere along the way our light, the light of God's glory, His goodness, dimmed and began to flicker.  The darkness took over more and more of our heart until our light went out completely.  I often wonder; each time that happens in an individual, does God look upon his created one and think, "this is not good.  It's bad."  I just have to wonder.  Light has always been on God's heart.  His Son came to earth to be the Light of the world and we were delivered out of darkness into His marvelous light! God is light and in Him there is no darkness.*

What would it take for your light to begin to shine once again?  A simple decision that goes something like this ...."This little light of mine, I'm gonna' let it shine.  This little light of mine, I'm gonna' let it shine.  Let it shine. Let it shine. Let it shine?"  When the flicker is seen within, beware of bushes and their tendency to hide the light of the God's image in you.

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=CVeB7ACVgO0&feature=related
*  John 8:12; I Peter 2:9 and I John 1:5

Fighting the GOOD Fight

I have a habit before I roll out of bed each day and head for my morning cup of coffee. A habit that serves me well and sets my heart and mind on what matters most as I face the demands of each day. It's the very first thing I do.  I do it before I put my feet on the floor or mentally process what's on my plate for the day.  It comes before coffee, a shower or my morning email check. It's one of the most treasured moments of my every day: listening to the Voice of Truth.

This morning was different.  I woke in a state of prayer, the talking side of the heavenly dialogue. I was working my way through reminding God about the needs of person-after-person-after-hurting-person who are facing insurmountable challenges.  Some of the specifics had me awake  throughout the night of a rather fitful sleep.  My running at the mouth morning prayer was an attempt to leave these dear ones in God's care in hopes I could get on with the fullness of the day I faced.  As I prayed a knot in my stomach grew. I contemplated the heartache some are currently facing ....

... a young single mom with unexplainable seizures that are more frequent instead of less as she lays in ICU, her family heartsick as they wait and pray for answers ...  the grieving family and friends of a local pastor who just passed from this life into eternity, a man whose presence on earth will be missed beyond description ... a couple who is separated and desperately trying to make some sense out of the place they find their once love-filled marriage ... my husband facing a new school year without his teaching partner of the last 14 years, his sense of loss and profound sadness ... the two young boys of my husband's teaching partner as they face the school year without the security and love of their mom  ... a pregnant mother with multiple health issues that keep her from sleeping day or night as she finds herself so physically depleted she can hardly function ... a family with five children, including a new born baby, who just lost their home and their van after months of the dad searching for a job but coming up short ... my sister planning a fundraiser to help with the medical bills that stack up like dust while she prepares for a heart transplant .... another friend facing the near-to-certain need for a liver transplant .... Andy's coach and his wife as they worry about the unanswered questions over all of the developmental and physical delays of their dear little one-year old baby girl .... my precious mother lying in the same bed, in the same room day-after-day-after-long-day with a palatable desire to die so she can go to heaven and be with Jesus ... a couple heartsick over their adult daughter's divorce, to embrace her gay lifestyle and lover ... others grieving loss after death, divorce, a move, cut-backs at work, a broken relationship ... and on and on it goes.

As my prayer list grew so did the knot in my stomach, as did a sense of dread and being overwhelmed.  Both began to settle on me like a wet and heavy blanket. At that moment, the Voice of Truth interrupted my thoughts and prayers ...

"You're fighting the good fight, Sherilyn.  Tthe good fight of faith."

As I meditated on that truth, the knot began to shrink and peace replaced the dread.  The good fight ... the good fight of faith ... that truth adjusted my perspective.  That is a fight worth fighting! We are all in a fight of some kind every day. We fight traffic when we're late, the clock to beat a deadline, the bank account being low and the needs being high, the demands at home versus those at the office, and more.  Beyond those more trivial things we often fight each other along with our sick or injured bodies, and others that are bigger yet.  We are all in a fight of some kind or another most of the time.  Few are worth our time, energy or money.  Some are unavoidable. The fights in life are part of why we go on vacation ... they are why we love to go to places like Disney World, a beach front house or plan a camping trip ... to escape the fight of daily life or to seek reprieve from the fight of a much greater magnitude.  And yet, there is a good fight. The fight of faith. 

FAITH is "perceiving as real fact 
what is not revealed to the senses." *

The good fight of faith is a fight we must choose regardless of the cry of our senses.  It's a demanding cry.  A relentless cry.  It's a cry that reasons, "If I can't see or feel it then it's not going to be."  Faith reasons, "I may not see or feel it but it's going to be!"  Faith comes by hearing the Voice of Truth.

Faith most often leads to a battlefield. No one is ever pushed onto the battlefield of faith.  Not even by God. One has to step into the fight of faith. It's a good fight.  Worth the long exhausting days that feel like war. Worth the unceasing threat of the enemy.  Worth the sacrifice of time praying for, serving or loving another.  Against all odds.  Faith is worth the battle wounds.  The fight of faith promises sure victory.  The fight of life promises nothing.

* Taken from Hebrews 11:1 in the Amplified Bible. The "good fight of faith" is taken from I Timothy 1:18 and 6:12; II Timothy 4:7.

Passing the Test

The last week has been a test.  Life at our house has changed again. Benjamin, our oldest, took his trek across the northern part of the country to return to Bethel University to start football camp.  He is with the senior players on a retreat as I type.  My every heartbeat is a prayer for Ben as he starts this landmark year and makes life-affecting decisions.  Andy, our youngest just returned from Lake Placid, New York where he played in an FCA Lacrosse Tournament.  He knew no one going in and weathered the newness like a champ.  He returned home to discover that the beloved lacrosse coach at Eastern University will no longer be his coach when he moves into his dorm in two weeks to start his sophomore year.  Andy is really sad about Coach Child's resignation.  His dad and I are heartsick.  With every beat of my heart I pray for Andy as he presses into a new year with many more challenges than that of a new coach.

Mothers worry.  I'm not a worrier by nature but as Ben and Andy's mother I have fought the urge to worry.  I seem to keep loosing that fight in recent days. When worry knocks at my door, I have to reckon with that fact that life has served me a test.  A test I've confronted many times before.  A test of whether or not I will trust the Father once again with my most prized possession; my children. The question begs an answer in my heart-of-hearts .... will I trust God with what feels like one of life's sweetest treasures or is my trust in Him limited to something I give lip service to?  As in a praise and worship service?  In a conversation? On the pages of my journal?

The criterion of the worry test is I Peter 5:6,7  (Amplified Bible)

                                         

" ... humble yourself [demote,lower yourself in your own estimation] under the mighty hand of God, that in due time He may exalt you.  Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all of your worries, all of your concerns, once and for all] on Him,
for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully."

Worry is pride.  If I'm to humble myself as I throw the weight of my cares on Him then, worry is pride.  Trusting is humility.  Humility always leads back to the cross.  Trust follows. As I meditated on I Peter 5:6,7, the phrase, "on Him" got stuck in my heart ... "on Him" is also mentioned in Isaiah 53, smack in the middle of the prophetic verse about the coming Messiah ... 

" ... the chastisement [needful to obtain] PEACE and WELL BEING for us was upon Him ..."

Jesus was chastised so that I could live worry-free.  Be at peace.  Enjoy well-being in my emotions. It was part of His destiny. To hang on the cross that chastised Him for my peace and well-being.

Dr. Larry Hutton identifies worry as perverted imaginations.  We all imagine daily ... how the meeting will go, what we should say to her or to him, what others will be wearing or saying or doing at the next event we must attend, how the family member will take the news, what the outcome of this decision or that decision will be and on and on it goes.

Worry doesn't solve tomorrows problems.  Worry destroys today's gifts.  Worry misses God's watchful care.  Worry fails the test.  Trust imagines good things happening ... even in the worrisome.  Trust is believing what God imagines.  Trust rests in God's watchful care. Trust passes the test.

Andy warming up at Eastern

Ben playing for Bethel in the Final Four

Humility 101

Some of  you have mentioned that you miss reading my posts (thanks for noticing!) and I want you to know that your words of encouragement fill me up, and are deeply appreciated.  I am not being a "blogging slacker." Smile.  The best way I can describe where I've gone is to say that God enrolled me in a crash course this semester. Humility 101 offers a rather intimate classroom setting, typically of two.  The instructor and I. Every now and then we take a field trip together, for points of discussion. I'm learning more than I knew I had to learn.

Somehow I simply can't find my words right now.  At least not for print. At least not while I'm still enrolled in this course. Please note that I will return.  I can't say when but I trust it will be soon.  Semesters are ending all over the country this time of year but I haven't heard yet if there is follow-up summer session for this one.  Smile. Time will tell.

Thanks for checking backdrop and for believing in my what I have to say.

Press On to Know the Lord

I've heard so many good stories from others about the challenge spurring them on to more meaningful and regular time with God.  The two weeks are up. New habits have been established.  Old habits renewed. I'm pressing on in my 21 day challenge, no longer posting journal entries ... 

Hosea 6:3 NLT

"Oh, that we might know the Lord!
      Let us press on to know him.
   He will respond to us as surely as the arrival of dawn
      or the coming of rains in early spring.”

Day 12 - No Words

Read my Bible in brief today.  In constant dialogue with the Father.  Grieving. No words to share right now.  Profoundly sad. At peace.  Weary in body and soul. Grateful that Jesus captured my heart so long ago.  So grateful! He is all together lovely.  Altogether worthy.  Altogether wonderful to me.

Day 11 - Some Days Are Like That

I spent time with God today and it was good. 

I continued my reading in Jeremiah and read some amazing verses but nothing was sticking to my insides. Nothing seem to soothe my soul. I mostly prayed. Listening and talking.  More like thinking.

I'm grieving and full of sadness for my husband who has lost his teaching buddy, Beth who from my perspective left this earth too soon.  She has two young sons and a husband who loves her.  I'm grieving for Grant and Conner and Pat and for those dear middle school students who loved Mrs. Donghia. And don't seem to know Mr. Jameson without her. 

God's ways are not are ways, His ways are higher than our ways (Isaiah 55:8) so I trust. 

And then there's my almost 83 year old mother whose body no longer functions independently.  At all. The dear woman lost her ability to feed herself a few weeks ago. It was the only function she had left.  It's gone now.  She and I have lost the ability to talk on the phone.  So sad. Mother is an aging woman begging Jesus to "call her home."  He is silent.  At least, for now.

Beth had to leave, mom has to stay.  His ways are not our ways, they are higher than our ways.  I need to trust.

I'm tired and my heart is aching for those I love that seem to have lost their willingness to think and act with wisdom. I'm sad and concerned for them.  Very seriously concerned.  My heart feels so heavy.  It has all day. 

Some days are like that.  Some times with God are like that too.

Day 10 - The Eternal Paths

The most pure meaning for the "ancient paths" in Jeremiah 6:16 is "eternal paths."  God is imploring us through Jeremiah to ASK for the eternal paths, those roadways that lead us to live our lives for what will go beyond this life.

Why does He tell us to ask for eternal paths?  Could it be because we have such a tendency to make this life our focus and our own happiness and achievements here on earth the important matters?  They do matter but they are not the eternal paths.  The eternal paths are those paths that lead us to live our lives by the two greatest commandments; to love the Lord our God with total abandon and to love others the way that we love ourselves (Matthew 22:36-40).  To love the Lord our God like that is the "most important, the principle commandment" according to the Amplified Bible. 

What a jolting reminder my husband I got this weekend about the brevity of life and our need to ask for the the eternal paths.  Our friend, and my husband's teaching partner for the last 15 years, literally dropped dead while on her treadmill this weekend.  Beth was a healthy 39 year old with much of life ahead of her.  She leaves behind two young sons and a husband who loved her.  She got up Saturday morning, drank a cup of coffee, talked with her sister on the phone and went to the basement to exercise while her husband and boys wrestled in the family room upstairs.  And in a moment, while exercising and enjoying life, God called her into eternity.  How could she know?  Did she leave anything undone, unsaid, unsettled?  Was there anything she might have done or said differently if she had known? Those of us who loved her are stunned. How could we have known?  Eternity comes in a moment.

Life is fragile and in the whole scheme of things, so very brief. James says that our life on earth is only a vapor. How long does your vapor, I mean your breath hang in the air on a frigid morning?  Seconds, maybe.  Such a vapor is the comparison to our lives, the length of our lives. The ancient paths, the eternal paths are the ones that Jesus walked on; doing the will of the Father, undoing the works of the devil as he healed bodies, souls, forgave sin and called many to follow after Him. 

As a follower of Jesus, the question begs to be answered in my own life; am I on the eternal paths?  God implores me in Jeremiah 6:16 to ASK Him to show me, lead me to the eternal paths and to WALK IN THEM.

Day 7 - 9 - God's Paths

“ … ASK for the ancient paths; ASK for the good way …”

Below are a few choice verses from my long list of them on God’s paths and way.

Jeremiah 18:15

“Yet my people have forgotten me; they burn incense to worthless idols, which made them stumble in their ways, in the ancient paths. They made them walk in byways, on roads not built up.”

Psalm 16:11 and Act 2:28 (Amplified Bible)

“You will show me the path of life; in Your presence is fullness of joy, at Your right hand there are pleasures forevermore.”

“You have made known to me the ways of life; You will enrapture me [diffusing my soul with joy] with and in Your presence.”

Psalm 25:8-12 (Amplified Bible)

“Good and upright is the Lord; therefore will He instruct sinners in [His] way.  He leads the humble in what is right, and the humble He teaches His way.  All the paths of the Lord are mercy and steadfast love, even truth and faithfulness are they for those who keep His covenant and His testimonies.  For Your name's sake, O Lord, pardon my iniquity and my guilt, for [they are] great.  Who is the man who reverently fears and worships the Lord? Him shall He teach in the way that he should choose.”

Psalm 27:10,11 (Amplified Bible)

“Although my father and my mother have forsaken me, yet the Lord will take me up [adopt me as His child].Teach me Your way, O Lord, and lead me in a plain and even path because of my enemies [those who lie in wait for me].”

Psalm 119:35

“Direct me in the path of your commands, for there I find delight.”

Proverbs 4:26 (Amplified Bible)

“Consider well the path of your feet, and let all your ways be established and ordered aright.”

Proverbs 5:6

The adulterous woman “gives no thought to the way of life; her paths wander aimlessly, but she does not know it.”

Romans 11:33 (Amplified Bible)

“Oh, the depth of the riches and wisdom and knowledge of God! How unfathomable (inscrutable, unsearchable) are His judgments (His decisions)! And how untraceable (mysterious, undiscoverable) are His ways (His methods, His paths)!”

Day 7 and Day 8 and ????

Although one of my strengths is to think strategically, by no means am I a methodical thinker.  Nor do I process step-by-step, line-by-line. You can imagine therefore, that my study of God's Word isn't methodical either. However, hear what I'm not saying; a well-mapped out approach to reading/studying the Bible offers a comprehensive understanding of the written word of God and it's good. It's necessary to accurately understand and explain the word of Truth (II Timothy 2:15).  I often require myself to read and study in that way but it's laborious for me.  It feels like a chore (not all bad), it's personally counter-intuitive.  All of that to say, for those who may be following my 21 day journey,  I did not skip Day 7 or Day 8, etc. but I'm off on a search in Scripture about "the good way" and I'm collecting a list of verses, definitions if you will, to "the ancient paths and the good way" as mentioned in Jeremiah 6:16.  It's imperative to interrupt Scripture with  Scripture so that's where I am, "standing at the crossroads and looking."  Stay tuned for that list ....

Day 6 - The Path that Leads to Life

Jeremiah 6:16

(New American Standard)

“Thus says the LORD, Stand by the ways and see and

ask for the ancient paths, where the good way is, and walk in it;

 and you will find rest for your souls …”

You may have noticed by now that I love to read the same scripture in multiple versions. I find that helps me get my heart and head around its meaning.  So, as I meditate on Jeremiah 6:16, I’m compelled to know what the ancient paths are and what the good way is. There are many places where God talks about paths, and a way and more.  I read a number of them and landed on Psalm 16:11 that are referred to in the New Testament, in Acts 2:28. King David asks to be shown the path of life as found in the presence of the Lord where there is joy and pleasure. Fullness of joy and pleasures forevermore. A place where I will be “enraptured with joy.”  Is it possible, Lord?  There’s no doubt YOU can diffuse my soul with joy as the Amplified Bible puts it (Acts 2:28) but then why do I all too often miss it? Is it my unbelief?  My sense of hurry?  Have I have filled myself up with so many other idols that there just isn’t room for You, for the joy and pleasure you offer?  I’d be a fool to not show up for such an offer.  Show me the path, the road, the way of living that leads me to you where your offer is sure and life, true life, can be had.

I asked the Lord for salvation for those in my life who don’t seem to know Jesus personally.  I prayed Psalm 16:11 for them.

Day 5 - Rest for Your Soul

While yesterday’s time with the Father seemed to be about asking for the good paths, today seemed to illuminate the phrase “find rest for your soul.” 

Interestingly, I didn’t get in my time this morning.  I had an unexpected interruption and had to wait.  Not an excuse, just an explanation. I went on to work where a day of meetings and emails and studying begged for my attention.  I have the glorious privilege of being in paid ministry and we happen to have a brand new Prayer Cabin on our property where our church offices our. (I know, it’s amazing!)  Knowing I would be out all evening for ministry, I found a space late in my work afternoon to sneak over to the Prayer Cabin for a mini-retreat.  I spent just over an hour in the presence of the Holy One. I snuggled up in the comfy easy chair, covered up under a blanket and after soaking in some praise music and talking with the Lord I found myself nodding off.  Now let me back-track to explain that each day at the end of my time with Him I write “ASK” at the top of a clean journal page and wait for the whisper of what I am to ask for.  This afternoon however, I sensed the Lord urging me to not write “ask” but instead, to write, “PAUSE.”  Thus, I did. And then my mind followed my pen as I wrote a letter to me, from the Father.

“Sherilyn, you are weary and tired.  Soul weary and body tired.  You’re empty.  I’m so glad you are coming to Me, the fountain of Living Water.  Your soul is parched and thirsty.  Your body is begging for rest.  Come, drink from My fountain.  Come, retreat in My presence.  Come, lay at My feet and rest.  Come, enjoy sweet relief from the demands of your world.  And above all, when you come, Relax.  (Imagine here the my list of all the things weighing heavy on my heart and mind.) Your time is in My hands.  I love you. What else matters?  I love you. I am enough for all that concerns you.  I love you.  I’ll make a way where there seems to be no way.  I love you.  That will never ever change.  I love you.  Now and forever.  You alone are mine.  I alone am God; Father, Savior and Comforter.  Receive.” 

Immediately upon writing in my journal, I fell asleep. I think that’s ok.  To sleep during our time with Him.  We sleep when we are relaxing with those we are close to. I think its ok to sleep when we are with God.  I really do.  I wonder if God watched me as I enjoyed my little catnap like I used to watch my boys when they were sleeping?  And I wonder if He smiled as He stood over me there in that small prayer cabin resting?  Like I used to smile with such contented delight over my children as they slept.  I woke and re-read Jeremiah 6:16 in the NIV Bible  …

“Ask where the good way is,

walk in it,

and you will find rest for your soul.”

From there I read Isaiah 55:1-3 where we are invited to come to the waters if we are thirsty and without money to come, buy and eat” and then I read all of Isaiah 58 about fasting and Sabbath.  The Holy Spirit said that Sabbath is His invitation for us to “press pause” and rest; body, soul and spirit. I love that! Press pause and rest.  Ultimately, the promise here is that when we find the good paths, the ancient ways and then walk in them, rest will be by-product.  And who doesn’t need rest these days?  What renewal for me as I spent time with Him there in our little Prayer Cabin. It was good to be in His presence this afternoon.

Day 4 - Stand at the Crossroads and Look

It’s Monday and thus, I was able to have some extended time with God today as Monday is my day off, sort of.  Smile.  It was so good to be with Him and not be in a hurry.  It was rich and it filled me up. 

My continued search for Scriptures with the word “ask” in them took me to Jeremiah 6 today.  I was reading in the Amplified Bible.

“Thus says the Lord, ‘Stand by the roads and look, and ASK for the eternal paths where the good, old way is; then walk in it, and you will find rest for your souls.’  But they said, ‘We will not walk in it.’”

To ask is to inquire or beg. Some versions say “stand in the crossroads” indicating a fork in the road that leaves one with a choice.  And at that moment of deciding which way to go, we are to LOOK or consider the choices and ASK for those paths that keep eternity in focus and lead us to walk in the good way, the pleasant way according to the Hebrew meaning.  As God shows us the good way, we must then choose to walk down that pathway.  It’s easy to be appalled at the people of the Old Testament who said obstinately; “we will not walk there” until I happen to hear my own voice among them responding the same way to the path God shows me.  I think right now I too stand at a crossroad and as I stand, I’m looking as I begin to “beg” for the ancient paths that are good for me.

Let your mercy lead the way, Lord.

Day 3 - Filling Up on God

My journal pages are filling up again. Its been awhile and it’s not that the journal is coming to life, it’s that I am! 

Today's time with God was a simple one of reflecting and confessing and cleansing.  My journal feels too raw.  Deep. Personal.  But His words that were my reflection are full of life and renewal.

Proverbs 30:5-9

 ⁵ “Every word of God is flawless;
   he is a shield to those who take refuge in him.
⁶ Do not add to his words,
   or he will rebuke you and prove you a liar.
 ⁷ “Two things I ask of you, LORD;
   do not refuse me before I die:
⁸ Keep falsehood and lies far from me;
   give me neither poverty nor riches,
   but give me only my daily bread.
⁹ Otherwise, I may have too much and disown you
   and say, ‘Who is the LORD?’
Or I may become poor and steal,
   and so dishonor the name of my God.

Day 2

Another rich time with the Father this morning.  Psalm 39:5 in the Amplified Bible tells us that’s God’s favor (grace) is for a lifetime. It also puts it this way, “His favor, grace is life …”  I love that.  It’s proven true for me, His grace is life to me.  And then in verse 10, the psalmist offers a short prayer,

“Hear, O Lord, have mercy and be gracious to me.

O Lord, be my helper.”

I would end those sentences with an explanation point. Smile.  How I need the mercy and grace of the Lord.  How I need Him as my helper.  In His grace is life, and even in my asking I am desperate for His grace and mercy for there, in my asking, I find impure motives , selfishness, fear, pride, self-pity and more.  I am reminded of the angel of the Lord who spoke to Zerubbabel and told him to cry out or “SHOUT GRACE” to the mountain of human obstacle (Zechariah 4 Amplified Bible). I follow this wise instruction.  I shout, cry out loud in desperation for God’s unmerited favor to the people and situations that weigh heavy on my heart.  People I know personally, and otherwise. 

Hearts and relationships broken seemingly beyond repair.  Healing of body, soul and spirit.  Those who've not yet tasted the salvation of Jesus.  As I listed in my journal those things that concern me, I prayed that His goodness would be the solution in each life and circumstance. In mine and in theirs. 

• My heart weighs heavy for my mother who is like an invalid and longs to say her final goodbye on earth so she can take up residence in her heavenly home.  But her heart beats on and we wait with her for the Lord to call her home. 
• I choke up when I read the blog of friends who long for the children of their heart yet unknown to them, to come home and snuggle safely in their beds, and in the arms of their parents while the Ethiopian government makes decisions affecting that choice.  I can't quite get over the hope and faith their hearts display nor the longing and heart wrenching sadness in their story.
• How do we wrap our heart or head around the unfathomable needs of those in Japan who are suffering the devastation of the earthquake and the tsunami? Lives lost.  Dreams shattered. Hope hanging by a thread.
• And the dear young friend I know who resides out-of-state in a rehab doing the hard work of reflecting, regrouping and rebuilding.
• Or the other friend whose paraplegic brother took his own life and now the family longs for him, and for their questions to be answered. 
• So many friends whose adult children seem lost and are slowly becoming strangers to the parents they once knew and loved. 
• And on and on and on …. the list could go. 

The cry of my heart is that of the Psalmist for those who need a savior, a healer, a counselor, a deliverer and a friend. “Hear, O Lord, have mercy and be gracious to them!  O Lord, be their helper!”

Day 1

I overslept, felt discouraged but got up and enjoyed with Him anyway.  Hope it kicked the devil in the butt!!!!  Spent 40 minutes in my Bible, journal and in prayer that flew by like it was 5.  LOVED it!  IN pressing on with my 2011 theme, “ASK” – I decided to do a mini-word study on passages in the Bible with the word “ask.”  There aren’t tons but enough.  When I exhaust the list of verses with ask in them, I am going to move on the word “cry” or “cry out.” I started in the OT and today I read Psalm 27 and journaled.  David penned this psalm when he was older, most scholars believe it was around the time he was 70 years old. I was struck by the ONE THING he would ask for at this point in his journey of life, the only thing that seems to matter as life wears on – to daily be in the house, or the presence of the Lord.  It’s the only place that soothes a heart that’s breaking when life is beating on it or in David’s case, when eternity seems upfront and personal.  His presence is the safe harbor when conflict ensues and bitterness works overtime to take root within. His Word is the solace when the battle in our mind rages fierce and hope seems to only be thread.  And His mercy and loving-kindness give us courage when staying faithful and peaceful and loving seems nearly impossible.  The presence of the Father ushers in relief, restores perspective and promises sure victory. Ultimately, that’s the ONE THING I want too and yet, the Holy Spirit still beckons me to ask keep asking …. To expect a miracle.  To look for the Lord and taste of His goodness in all things, at all turns.

In my time with Him, I felt compelled to ASK for Him to do something supernatural in someone’s heart and life that is close to me.  I trust Him to show up in mighty ways.  My time set aside for Him was SO good … like water on parched land.

The 21 Day Challenge

I have been teaching a women’s Bible study called “The Moving Company” for eight years.  The Moving Company is all about “getting from where we are to where God wants us to be.”  Thus, the name.  

Last week at The Moving Company, I confessed my neglect of habitually practicing some of the Spiritual Disciplines for many months now. I shared that I sense the Lord beckoning me to exercise some self-discipline in re-creating the habit of daily time with Him, quality and quantity. So, after teaching from Luke 24 about the two who walked on the Emmaus road with Jesus, and yet did not recognize Him until he broke the bread, gave thanks and their eyes were opened, I offered a small challenge to The Moving Company girls.  On the basis of Luke 24:32, I challenged them to make one change in regard to the Spiritual Disciplines of Prayer and personal Bible Study (reading/meditating) over the following two weeks. 

Not wanting to challenge anyone to do anything without doing it myself, I renewed my commitment to spend time with God every day for three weeks as experts say it takes 21 days to form a new habit.  (I asked the girls for two weeks because The Moving Company meets every two weeks.)  I've decided to post my journal on each of those 21 days here on my blog. There is no promise of anything profound, just simple truths from His Word that lighten my load, renew my mind and move me toward transformation in my heart, and life. I will return to Day 1 which was Thursday, March 17, 2011 and add the journal entries prior to today. 

Here's to a new habit and prayerfully, a changed life ....

Luke 24:32 

“They asked each other,

‘Were not our hearts burning within us while

he talked with us on the road
and opened the Scriptures to us?’”  

(italics mine)

A Grace-clinger Observes Lent

I read a blog recently where the author referred to herself as a grace-clinger.  I like that.  Grace. My only hope in my brokenness.  My only help for my inadequacies. Grace. God loving me when I deserve otherwise. Grace. God’s mercy singing its melody over my confusion and heartache and sin. I love grace – the sound of it, and the reality of it.  I too would call myself a grace-clinger and yet in recent weeks I sense that my life is somewhat out-of-balance.  I'm not sure you can ever err too much on the side of grace when it comes to giving it to others.  But I know I can err too much on dishing it out to myself.  I use it as an excuse to be something less than I should be.  I use it as justification for not doing something I really should do.  The Grace-giver is beckoning me to bring balance back into my habits through purposeful self-discipline and all the while, to keep clinging to grace.  Enter Lent. 

Lent is a rather foreign observance to me. Sad but true. I didn’t grow up observing Ash Wednesday nor the season of Lent.  I've never understood much about either.  In fact, I’ve never given liturgy a lot of thought at all. But the Father gently led me to consider the intention of Lent; to help Christ followers prepare to celebrate Resurrection Sunday, and beyond, with total abandon.  I wonder why we never did that?  Never observed Lent that is, in my home nor in the churches where I learned about following Jesus. Hmmm.  Wikipedia explains it this way; “Lent in the Christian tradition, is the period of the liturgical year from Ash Wednesday to Easter.  The traditional purpose of Lent is the preparation of the believer – through prayer, repentance, alms-giving and self-denial – for the annual commemoration during Holy Week of the Death and Resurrection of Jesus, which recalls the events linked to the Passion of Christ and culminates in Easter, the celebration of the Resurrection of Jesus Christ.”  I’m far from a traditionalist but I like that purpose. As a lover and follower of Jesus, to avail myself to anything that holds promise of preparing my heart to more fully celebrate His resurrection, and life, is good. 

Enter Lent 2011.  I’m observing Lent for the first time in my life, rather privately. Doing much of anything privately is a bit atypical for me. Observing Lent is way out of the norm. (Well, maybe I'm not observing it so privately now that I’m posting about it on my blog.  Smile.)  Somehow, much of this first go-around with Lent feels too intimate to share, let alone post about.  The prayers, the repentance and the giving to the poor feels sacred and I find myself being reserved about sharing it.  Odd.  At least for me.  But the self-denial part, now that doesn't seem quite so intimate. I'll tell you what I have given up for Lent.  Although I'm not convinced it really falls into the category of self denial ... maybe more like generic self-control. Anyway, those who  observe Lent won't be surprised, it's a popular one. I’ve given up sugar.  Not just DQ Peanut Buster Parfaits, homemade apple pie, chocolate chip cookies or dessert when dining out.  Sugar in general. Almost completely.

Abstaining from sugar during Lent has an intended purpose for me personally - my desperate need for a lifestyle change.  My decision came after the Holy Spirit was nearly pleading with me to dig a little deeper than dieting and to move beyond what I prefer to call my "mild sugar addiction."  Is any addiction mild.  Seriously?  Mild is a word of justification.  Anyway, back to Lent ... so far, a few physiological changes are noticeable, all good once I got past a few days with a dull headache. I think my body begged in tandem with the Father for the changes I’m experiencing.  My greater need by far however, is spiritual in nature.  An urgency to return to some basic spiritual disciplines.  That urgency is at the root of my soul need but was manifest in my sugar addiction. (Just a mild one though.  Smile.)  Lent is leading the way back  ... To prayer ... talking and listening to God.  To personal Bible study ... letting the Word of God renew my mind.  To meditation on the words of God ... time set aside daily to let Truth penetrate the fabric of my being.  To fasting ...  sitting still in the presence of the Father ... freeing up space for Jesus ... letting the Holy Spirit fill my soul hunger.

Lent.  Forty days set-aside for soul cleansing and more aggressive grace-clinging. I like that.