Passing the Test

The last week has been a test.  Life at our house has changed again. Benjamin, our oldest, took his trek across the northern part of the country to return to Bethel University to start football camp.  He is with the senior players on a retreat as I type.  My every heartbeat is a prayer for Ben as he starts this landmark year and makes life-affecting decisions.  Andy, our youngest just returned from Lake Placid, New York where he played in an FCA Lacrosse Tournament.  He knew no one going in and weathered the newness like a champ.  He returned home to discover that the beloved lacrosse coach at Eastern University will no longer be his coach when he moves into his dorm in two weeks to start his sophomore year.  Andy is really sad about Coach Child's resignation.  His dad and I are heartsick.  With every beat of my heart I pray for Andy as he presses into a new year with many more challenges than that of a new coach.

Mothers worry.  I'm not a worrier by nature but as Ben and Andy's mother I have fought the urge to worry.  I seem to keep loosing that fight in recent days. When worry knocks at my door, I have to reckon with that fact that life has served me a test.  A test I've confronted many times before.  A test of whether or not I will trust the Father once again with my most prized possession; my children. The question begs an answer in my heart-of-hearts .... will I trust God with what feels like one of life's sweetest treasures or is my trust in Him limited to something I give lip service to?  As in a praise and worship service?  In a conversation? On the pages of my journal?

The criterion of the worry test is I Peter 5:6,7  (Amplified Bible)

                                         

" ... humble yourself [demote,lower yourself in your own estimation] under the mighty hand of God, that in due time He may exalt you.  Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all of your worries, all of your concerns, once and for all] on Him,
for He cares for you affectionately and cares about you watchfully."

Worry is pride.  If I'm to humble myself as I throw the weight of my cares on Him then, worry is pride.  Trusting is humility.  Humility always leads back to the cross.  Trust follows. As I meditated on I Peter 5:6,7, the phrase, "on Him" got stuck in my heart ... "on Him" is also mentioned in Isaiah 53, smack in the middle of the prophetic verse about the coming Messiah ... 

" ... the chastisement [needful to obtain] PEACE and WELL BEING for us was upon Him ..."

Jesus was chastised so that I could live worry-free.  Be at peace.  Enjoy well-being in my emotions. It was part of His destiny. To hang on the cross that chastised Him for my peace and well-being.

Dr. Larry Hutton identifies worry as perverted imaginations.  We all imagine daily ... how the meeting will go, what we should say to her or to him, what others will be wearing or saying or doing at the next event we must attend, how the family member will take the news, what the outcome of this decision or that decision will be and on and on it goes.

Worry doesn't solve tomorrows problems.  Worry destroys today's gifts.  Worry misses God's watchful care.  Worry fails the test.  Trust imagines good things happening ... even in the worrisome.  Trust is believing what God imagines.  Trust rests in God's watchful care. Trust passes the test.

Andy warming up at Eastern

Ben playing for Bethel in the Final Four