Ron’s Tribute
December 1999
As most of you know I am Ron’s infamous baby sister and baby me he did! From the time I can remember Ron considered it his personal mission to take care of me and look out for my happiness. I think I must have been aware of his loyalty to me even as a little girl because my earliest memory of Ron and I took place when I was 4 and he was about 12. He and a neighbor boy were involved in an innocent boyhood wrestling match but I thought that the boy was hurting my big brother. I took a metal rake out of our garage and wailed that kid over the head as hard as I could. I bet those stitches let the boy know he better not mess with Sherilyn’s brother again. Maybe that set the stage for the way Ron always seems so proud of me, I don’t know. At any rate that memory was the first of so many more that my dear brother and I shared over the 43 years that we loved each other.
I remember all the times, when I was a child that he would chase my sadness away by insisting that we go for an ice cream cone at 31 Flavors. To this day I love to drown my sorrows in a big bowl of ice cream. I remember the Christmas when I was 7 years old and I wanted this life-size teddy bear in the worst way. Shirley remembers that teddy bear too and the silly grin it wore on the play all the way from San Jose Reno
When he worked at Baskin Robbins, I remember the ice cream turkeys he made me out of my favorite 31 flavor, Jamoca Almond Fudge. I remember my many visits toSan Francisco
What I remember and treasure most, and what I will miss beyond description are the frequent and lengthy heart-to-heart talks Ron and I had over the years. What a joy it was to have shared such intimacy of heart with him, I am most grateful for that. You too had a few of those talks with him I’m sure for he was no respecter of persons; he shared himself, his philosophies, his love, acceptance and listening ear with all. During those talks my life and personal beliefs were challenged and enriched over and over again. He always left me feeling loved beyond measure and believing that, not matter what, the “sun will come out tomorrow.”
Being Ron’s baby sister afforded me so many life lessons; he was one who taught by example. From Ron I learned how to laugh at myself and not worry about tomorrow for God already had tomorrow all worked out today. I learned to take a hard and honest look at myself before blaming someone else and to take responsibility for myself first and foremost. I learned to ask myself if I could honestly say that I had “walked a mile in the other man’s moccasins?” I learned the art of being brave emotionally and how to confront others and circumstances with loving acceptance as if a good God dealt them to me for a reason, and Ron always reminded me that he had. I learned to understand before asking to be understood and to listen intently, with my heart. I learned how to “be” and not just “do”. I learned how to celebrate and have a good time, for no special reason. I learned to be more thankful, especially of the little things. Knowing and sharing a friendship with my dear brother enriched my life and my soul. I consider it MY privilege to have been Ron’s baby sister, and close friend.
Before telling of the last and most important lesson Ron taught me, I’ve asked Bill O’Keefe, Ron’s friend and mine, to stand with me for the remainder of this tribute. One of the most profound lessons I learned from my wonderful brother was that of tolerating and embracing the differences of others. If Ron told you much about me than I am sure that you know I am a Christian. Sadly, quite often, Christians and gays are considered enemies. Enemy was a word that Ron Green detested. I love this man, Bill although many would say that he should be my enemy, and I his. Bill and I, like Ron and I, have found common ground in our friendship that we can stand on regardless of our differing beliefs and opinions. I know that Ron, and the God that he and I love, would want it that way. I know that many of you have been hurt and wounded by Christians and organized religion. As a part of both of those groups, I beg your forgiveness and tell you that Christians have not always represented Jesus Christ well, or accurately. He came not to condemn but to invite us to His fountain of forgiveness, grace and mercy. He offers a free gift of salvation to those who are brave enough and humble enough to accept that gift. The gift is NOT religion but it is a relationship with a living and loving God.
What I remember most about the last year of my precious brother’s life was the freedom he finally found in understanding and accepting God’s unconditional love for himself personally - apart from religion. You all know the words that frequently crossed his lips in the last year, “Praise God!” Ron bowed his knee to the God of our childhood and I know that he was glad that he did. I take great delight in knowing that he is finally free of that diseased body and he is in God’s presence dancing and celebrating today.
There are not words to express the loss I feel personally as Ron and I talked nearly every day. (In recent days I listened and HE talked but believe me, I owed him a few years! J) We shared a very close friendship and I’m grateful. My heart could break with sadness over not having his love, his voice or his smile in my life while I finish out this journey on earth. However, I am comforted in knowing that his spirit lives on and resides in heaven where one day I will embrace him again and never have to say goodbye.
In closing, I want to say to anyone who feels that they may have hurt my brother in any way to leave that guilt and pain here in this room today. Never pick it up again, as Ron was the most loving, forgiving and merciful man I’ve ever know. He would not want you carrying that burden home with you. And I say to Ron, my dearest brother and friend, what I have said so many times before; there are not adequate words to express my intense love and gratitude for you! Your love and your life have enriched mine beyond any human deserving. I am indebted to God for allowing me the privilege of being your baby sister. I look forward to the day when I will see you again. There will not be a day that goes by in which I will not think of you adoringly - until then, Praise God!
Your Loving Baby Sister,
Sherilyn
Tina Marie Abraham Morgan’s Tribute
Dearest Tim,
It is with a broken heart that I write to you today on behalf of Tina’s passing from this life into eternal life in heaven.There are no tears for our precious Tina as her body is new and pain-free and she has now seen Jesus face-to-face, and hopefully has seen her parents and yours as well.And yet, her home going is an unspeakable loss for those of us still on earth. NO ONE knows that heartache like you and your dear Sophia and Luke do, and will continue to. My deepest sympathies to all of you, Tim. Your children are so blessed to have you for a dad.
Thank you from the bottom of my heart for calling me on Friday to tell me of Tina’s passing. What an extremely kind and respectful thing for you to do and particularly so with hindsight, as I now know that it was only hours after Tina had passed from this life to the next.Those phone calls had to be very, very hard for you.Thank you. I am sorry for the difficulty in hearing you as I was traveling by car in a mountainous area and I’m also sorry for the shock in my response. I knew that Tina’s health seemed to be failing significantly in recent months but I tried desperately to talk life with her and to respect her belief that she could fight and win her battle with cancer. I was so grateful to hear that you were by her side when she took her final breath although there was no doubt that you would be, Tim. I will not be able to think of anything but you and your children, as well as Raymond, Nora, Sarah and Lou Ann tomorrow, the day of Tina’s memorial service.My heart, thoughts and prayers will be with you; I trust it will be a day that has enough joy from the wonderful memories to soften the sadness just a bit.
YOU were the best gift that God ever afforded my dear friend, Tina.From the moment you laid eyes on her at TGI Friday’s at Biltmore Plaza and told her how beautiful she was, until last Friday morning when I’m sure you did the same, and more.You have been the best lover and friend she could ever dream of; Tina often told me it was so! No one was ever able to help Tina fully see her beauty and value like you were, Tim. No one was ever really able to handle her emotionally driven nature in such a respectful and beneficial way for her, like you did. No one was ever able to express in words how precious and wonderful she was, and make her believe it was true, until you came along and did so. What unspeakable joy and contentment you brought to our dear Tina’s soul. Next to her relationship with Jesus, you were the greatest gift in her life.
I have oh so many memories of my precious friend, Tina over the years; I’ll share a few with you in hopes that they will make you smile and that they might connect your heart and mine over the distance and during this difficult time of grieving her loss on earth. I met Tina when were 16, just 2 weeks after her father’s tragic death.Although our connection was deeply spiritual and emotional as she was working through the loss of her dad at such a young, innocent age, we mainly had an instant connection over a mutual admiration for one anothers hair and we talked often about the best lipstick a girl should wear ... imagine that!Smile. We were still talking lipstick waaaay into our adult lives. As you know, there wasn’t anyone who knew how to tell you the truth in love quite like Teen did. And on one of our many walks aroundRoadrunner Park 32nd Street
It seems that one, or both of us were on an eternal diet and do you know that her mother died thinking that I ate whole packages of cookies from their pantry when I never ate even ONE single cookie?!?!?! That dear Tina would sneak into the pantry after her mom had gone to bed and scarf down an entire package of cookies. Then, when Ginny would ask what happened to the cookies, Tina would say, and I quote because we went over this story MANY so times, “Poor Sherilyn did.Bless her heart, when she starts eating cookies, she just can’t stop herself.” And she always ended the conversation by telling her mom to not “mention it to Sherilyn because it would embarrass her.” Can you believe it? Tina didn’t confess this scenario to me until AFTER Ginny died so I was never able to tell her the truth.Sigh. I bet Tina and her mother will have a good laugh in heaven about that one!
Surely Tina told you about the woman, Sharon Ast, at North Phoenix who paid big bucks for Tina and me to work on her farm for a day? THAT DAY sealed our lifetime friendship above all others.The youth group at NPBC had an auction type of event in which adults in the church could pay for teenagers in the youth group to work for them and the money went toward summer camp scholarships.Well, Mrs. Ast could hardly wait to get the two pink, prissy girls (Tina and I) on her farm to teach them a lesson or two. Other than cleaning the chicken coup (eewwwwwwww!) and something we had to do with pigs or some kind of animal pen that was so dirty, I don’t remember much about what we had to do because I think I’ve blocked it from my memory!However, what I do remember is that no matter what we were asked to do, Tina and I did more screaming, plugging our noses and hugging each other than we did work. Mrs. Ast watched us off and on all day from a big bay window and laughed like there was no tomorrow and it’s a good thing she enjoyed watching us because the entertainment may have been all that she got for her money, she certainly didn’t get much done on her farm that day!!! I’m sure Tina and I even wore lipstick for our farm jobs on the Ast farm. Smile.
I remember when Ginny died and how insistent dear Tina was about singing at her mother’s funeral even though many advised her against it. I was not one of them. I sat by my dear friend who sobbed through the entire funeral service EXCEPT when she stood up to sing and honor her mother with her song. It was amazing and it was such a statement about who Tina was, a loyal girl who held relationships above all other things in life. We slept in her bedroom the night of her mother’s service and we both cried and held each other as we remembered her mom and talked of Tina’s uncertain future as an 18 year old “orphan.” I got up to get a drink of water in the kitchen that night and I had to pass through the living room where her uncle was sleeping on the couch ... sadly, I can not think of his name, it was her mother’s brother ... maybe Uncle Ferris?Anyway, as I quietly passed through the living room to get to the kitchen, I overheard her dear uncle crying and praying aloud for his sister, Genevieve. When I returned to Tina’s bedroom to relay the story, I could hardly contain my emotions and soon we were both sobbing again and worried all night long about her uncle.We shared an ability to cry, over people and life, that few if any others ever fully understood.
I remember well so the large package that arrived in the mail soon after my brother died.Teen has sent me a box full of pink items that she knew I would love including a soft, pink teddy bear to hug when I was missing my brother ... she always took time to be so thoughtful to others! How well you know, Tim. I remember the exchanged clothes and the long phone conversations no matter how far apart we lived; 10 minutes away or 10 states away. I remember the grape leaves she taught me how to make and although we tried so hard to save a few for the next day, Tina and I always ate the entire pan of them in one sitting and moaned with such satisfaction as we ate them. I remember the laughter that came so easily, and the tears that never stopped between us ... and the journey would go on down a very long stretch of memory lane. You and I were so blessed to call her friend, Tim. I’m certain that you know how deeply she loved you but do you know that her every word about you was always layered with expressions of indescribable admiration, appreciation and adoration for you, Tim? YOU were the best friend and husband Tina could have ever hoped for and to say that we are all extremely grateful for that would be a gross understatement.
May you know God’s peace and strength as you face tomorrow, and every day after that, Tim.
With much love and my sincere sympathy to you, Sophia and Luke,
Sherilyn
A Tribute to Daddy
July 2010
There have been many unspoken words between my daddy and me over the years.Some would express heartache, sadness and disappointment while others would be filled with joy, admiration and gratitude. I learned first hand from his life that our precious Lord Jesus is the God of a second chance and I speak that message to all who will listen. I learned by watching daddy how to love people and live life to make them smile. He sought to be a blessing to those in his daily life, including strangers as he was no respecter of persons. He loved the young and the old, the wealthy and those of less opportunity, the educated and the simple, the friendly and the lonely. It is an art to be a blessing to others and I learned that art in the classroom of daddy’s life.
I loved his determined way of looking on the bright side of things and believing the best in others. It was rare to hear him say an unkind word about anyone. He was quick to admit his own shortcomings but slow to point out those of others. We all have favored comments of daddy’s and one of mine is something I heard him say SO often, “If that’s the worst problem we’ve got today, darlin, then we’re doin’ great!” Our own boys now say that same thingback to me. In fact, our youngest son, Andy, wrote a poem about his grandpa in this regard. Andy writes,
“Sometimes life brings you down, and drowns
But grandpa always stood above.
In our world that is often full of evil and hate, grandpa was one that always shared his love.
Sometimes what’s expected becomes rejected
But grandpa always learned to accept it.
Our world is full of greedy and lazy but grandpa refused to quit.
When some would pout and pity themselves, grandpa chose a different path.
He would stand tall and say these words, ‘If that’s the worst problem we have today, buddy then we are doin’ great!’
For all who grandpa Green had met,
This one thing in their mind is set; it’s Harold Green we’ll ne’r forget!’”
Sometimes Daddy’s jokes were corny or worn out and often I wanted to scream, “Be serious for just one minute, Dad!” but I loved that light-hearted approach to life and the fact that it brought smiles and laughter to me, and to those around us. I value humor so much in my life and much of the thanks goes to daddy. He showed us all that humor certainly makes this journey called life more bearable!
It was from him that I caught the joy and excitement of one sinner coming to the foot of the cross and although I don’t have the gift of telling the story of Jesus like daddy did, I was able to catch his burden and passion to pray for the salvation of others and to share my faith whenever the opportunity avails itself. I am grateful for daddy’s legacy in that regard. He often said, “Just talk about Jesus in the normal traffic pattern of your life” and what richness that brought!
I loved my daddy’s affection, those big bear hugs filled me up and blessed me and they will be sorely missed by many. I will always remember daddy’s tenderheart and how he would cry at the drop of a hat – or a commercial or a pregnant woman or a sappy movie – I loved that about him and I am my father’s daughter in that regard.
It’s so good to be celebrating his life here at North Phoenix Baptist Church
“Hi troops!”
“Hello Success!”
His smile, his encouraging words and his insistence upon making others feel good about themselves brought life to so many! Daddy gave us a glimpse of who Jesus might have been if he were walking around on the earth still today. He leaves a big hole, in our hearts and in this city.
Daddy and I missed out on some things in this earthly life as father and daughter but for all of that, he knew I was at peace. I told him so I also told him that I’m convinced that what we missed will be returned to us ten-fold on the other side of eternity by our Redeemer. The “eternal weight of glory” that Paul refers to in 2 Corinthians, will indeed outweigh the light and momentary trouble and heartache we experienced on earth. I am glad Harold Green was my Daddy and I am eternally grateful that a long time ago, in a small country church when he was 21 years old, the Lord wrestled him to the ground with His amazing grace, and saved him and thus, Daddy waits for us in his heavenly home today.
A number of years ago I told daddy that I was praying that the Holy Spirit would rest upon him in his final years on earth and give him the peace that passes all understanding no matter what might come his way. The Lord was faithful to that prayer. We rejoice today that appropriately, on Sunday morning, the Father called Daddy to the other side where he received a group hug from the Trinity and was welcomed into paradise and possibly preached his best sermon yet! We look forward to the day we will meet him there and until then we’ll take his advice and keep looking up, while we keep our eyes on the eastern sky.
If daddy were able to join us today at his own funeral, I think he’d say, “Goodbye troops!” So – goodbye daddy. I love you and I’ll see you soon!!
Your Youngest Daughter,
Sherilyn
